On Resilience...

I remember a time when I did not believe in children.  I didn’t believe in their capabilities, their strength(s), and their resilience. Because of this, my image of the child was one of fragility and weakness.  To my credit, I worked at a mental health therapeutic nursery for children who lived in extreme poverty and continually dealt with the often traumatic realities of toxic stress.  However, my view of them was still too small, still lacking, still insufficient.  

And then I began to believe.  I began to believe that children are not made of glass; but rather, courage, strength, and ambition.  I realized they are not made of something to fear.  Instead, they are made of something worth celebrating…

Children are resilient humans.  They are all resilient in a diversity of ways- no matter the child, no matter the context. Skovholt and Trotter-Mathison (2016) define resilience as “the ability to bounce back” (p. 125).  With this in mind, the very act of being born into this world is a heroic act of resiliency. a fetus journeying from the only environment it has ever known, only to enter the brightest, loudest, and the most disorienting experience of their existence as an infant.  Though this example is an extraordinary one, resilience is also cultivated within the mundane.  Masten (2001) spoke to this ordinary nature of resiliency saying, “Resilience does not come from rare and special qualities, but from the everyday magic of ordinary, normative human resources” (p. 235).  In this view, even trying to put on a shoe or overcoming the common cold is building resilience within the child’s physical and neurological processes.  In fact, the absence of such trying experiences only serves to delay the emergence of resiliency (which could also be termed here as development).   

Children, our children of Tumbleweed as well as those outside our doors, are such insatiable learners, protagonists, and explorers in the celestial beauty of existence.  They are theory-builders, co-conspirators, and conduits of grace.  We have the opportunity each day to witness their resilient journeys, as well as offer them the freedom to encounter new challenges and struggle once again.  And each time they bounce back, each time they overcome, we celebrate their beauty and wonder at their continual maturation.  Yes, our children are resilient!

Masten, A. S. (2001). Ordinary magic: Resilience processes in development. American Psychologist, 56(3), 227-238. Retrieved from http://doi.org.proxy.lib.pdx.edu /10.1037/0003-066X.56.3.227

Skovholt, T., & Trotter-Mathison, M. (2016). The resilient practitioner: Burnout and

compassion fatigue prevention and self-care strategies for the helping professions (3rd

ed.). New York, NY: Routledge. Retrieved from https://doi-org.proxy.lib.pdx.edu /10.4324/9781315737447